I have never cried so many times in a day in my life in front of so many people!!!!I feel something broke in me..but may be I gain something else with it too..how is it that when you feel sad, you feel you have aged million years?and the day will never end..but thank God that the day did end..with a strange smile and feeling on my face.

Today I will not be myself
Today I will learn to get my rights
Today I will show them that I am stronger than what they think
Today I will learn not to be myself
So pray for me just today

Some times despite my attempts not to prejudge people and situations I still do it. Here is what happened in the past three weeks and the cause of all has been miscommunication. In my job I have to write reports everyday and they go through a number of people that have to see that report and sign it. Since it's a very sensitive industry and FDA like a dog is looking at everything, no one likes to give them a reason to be questioned, since answering it would be complicated. Here is the situation.I got a product manufacutred from UK since I am in Quality Control, I have to make sure this drug is really what they say they have made.Now I realized that these drugs failed to meet the criterians and hence can not be released. Now after several people have looked at it, its situation is a mess, Talking to QA's manager, I realized that they have to come up with a reason to stop a formal investigation which can take months. Initially I thought my supervisor is after me to nail me, with her attitude, but talking to QA made more sence. If she had communicated well, our department wouldn't have been having a hectic environment in the past few weeks. At the end of the day, I am just glad that my decision on failing the drugs were the same with the results of a 15 year exprienced person in our department. I hold my self responsible if a patient take a drug that is said to be 200mg +/- 5% to be consuming a 217 mg drug. It has passed the spec. by so much..anyway for peopole not in this business might seem strange, but we talk about small numbers..all the time..and how it affects and all that..it's the nature of pharmaceutical industry:)

Sun Set Beach

Yesterday after work, that seems to get busier by the minute, My friend and I decided to go to sun set beach. You rearly find nice weather in Canada.Either its too hot and humid or it's cold and with windchilled. Last night I had skirt with sandles but a coat on top of it!!it was funny, A lady was walking by and was looking at me strangely!!I guess she hasn't seen a person with both summer and winter cloth together at the same time;) walking along the shore was wonderful, and the best part was when the sun set..then and there I realized why it is called Sun set beach..the colors and sun setting on the water was magnificant. We got dinner and sat on the grass and while eating watched the sun set. Afterwards we discovered a small park that I didn't know exists, Called Jessie something park..anyways I forgot her family name, the park was named after a couple who were operating a resort and after they decided not to operate, they gave the resort back to the government. The history of their life was written on a stone on that park:)I wonder if I can get something like that at some point in my life..but for different reasons;)isn't it cool?

This weekend was great..friday night, after an listening to a very interesting discussion group, I head off to see my girlfriends. Miss M and L:)It was so relaxing walking down Yonge street on a great weather..we stopped at Cafe Mirage for a coffee and ended up staying there for 2.5 hours;)Catching up with friends is always great..specially you hear great news of engagement of your dear friends..I can't beilieve how this year from the start, I keep hearing about engagement and marriage of my friends. Must be a great year;)"sale khoroose digeh";)haha..anyways saturday I watched 1 movie and 2 half a movie;)..finished one half movie and then watched one and saw half the other one.."Autumn in New York", "Basic Instinct", "How to marry a millioner" are the chronological order..well Autumn in New York was a lot like Sweek November, But I think there was an ambiguity in the story line for the audiences, whereas in the aformentioned one it was simple and quite heart breaking. Basic instinct was a detective/mystry movies, and the ending was a dual for the audience..you could guess who the killer is and can justify it..but now that I am writing this critic about it, I just realized who the actual killer was and how she manipulated the whole deal!!!I wasn't paying too much attention to the last movie where Marilyn Monroe was acting in, since I was learning how to play Romi with my friend..cool game:)Although in my humble opinion there not much of a thinking involved;)may be I am just a beginner in this game..anyways I am not a big fan of Marilyn Manroe, the way she speaks drives me crazy,"eshveye kharaki miad"!!!and last but not least, sunday I enjoyed my time with my parents and our family friends outdoors at one of the shores of lake Ontario..it was really refreshing althouh it was cold!!!!!!!!